Where have you seen this one before? A grizzled, graying gay filmmaker fixates on a past relationship which prevents him from moving forward in present day. If Pedro Almodóvar’s wonderful Pain And Glory comes to mind, you have just won the trivia contest, but not so fast, as Before We Forget, co-written and directed by Juan Pablo Di Pace and Andrés Pepe Estrada shares a lot of the same DNA. Think of it as Pain And Glory but without Almodóvar’s trademark red, yellow and blue iconography yet with its own unique perspective on love and memories.
When we first meet Matias (Di Pace also stars as the adult version of the character), he struggles to finish an obviously deeply personal film. After he completes his final shot, he insists to his producer that they forgot a physical bit of business and need one more take. Pushing back, the producer coerces Matias into calling it a wrap on the production, but we know this decision will haunt our protagonist. You can see the hurt in his eyes, the first indication that Di Pace has a knack for delivering a quietly naked, emotional performance.
As Matias delays completion of his edit, we flash back to 1997 at an Italian boarding school where Young Matias (Santiago Madrussan) arrives from Argentina and immediately immerses himself in the crazy, theater geek atmosphere of fellow students hugging and befriending each other a bit too quickly. He soon encounters Alexander (Oscar Morgan), a Swedish lad with wild charisma and dramatic flair. Inseparable almost immediately, Matias falls hard for his new pal, but it remains unclear if Alexander feels the same. The push-pull chemistry between this pair of actors feels palpable, both delivering highly accomplished, heartbreaking performances. When an incident forces Alexander out of the school, Matias feels lost at sea.
Relief, however, comes when Matias receives an invitation to join Alexander and his family at Christmas time, along with Matias’ parents (vividly portrayed by Araceli González and Fabián Mazzei, spouses in real life as well). With the family dynamics and the addition of Alexander’s beautiful sister Kathrine (Julia Bender), Matias retreats to the closet and outwardly shows interest in Kathrine. This creates a rift between the young men, one which will remain possibly for the rest of their lives. The themes of unrequited love and hiding your true self resonate deeply in this film, helped immeasurably by Madrussan’s access to the pain his character experiences. So much goes unspoken, including a devastating scene of Matias in his parent’s car as they pull away from their visit.
Di Pace and Estrada have a gift for visually conveying so much, including the keen watchfulness of González, Mazzei, and Sarah Parish as Alexander’s mother. When parents of queer children state they always knew, this film does an excellent job of showing us just that. Shot with clear precision by cinematographer Devin Doyle, the film never loses sight of our main characters’ feelings. The flashbacks in particular have a heady rush to them, supported so well by the over-the-top-energy of young students.
In the present day, intercut throughout with the past, Matias continues to struggle with his memories and how they affect his ability to finish his own story. It all leads to an event guaranteed to open old wounds. Partially based on Di Pace’s personal experiences, this movie for some may feel like a therapeutic exercise in which filmmaker makes a film about a filmmaker trying to work through childhood issues. On the surface, this may seem trite, especially when the actual plot of the film doesn’t tell us anything new. This isn’t the first portrayal of a gay guy navigating a crush, but the story doesn’t go the expected route. So much remains unresolved, yet that’s the point. Your mileage may vary in deciding if such decisions satisfy or not.
For me, the movie works because the filmmakers want to challenge our relationship to our own memories. Di Pace really shines in the final moments with a mature and gorgeous monologue in which he directly confronts his past and opens the gates for what lies ahead. Di Pace has a compelling presence, transparent yet never pushing things too hard. He has such promise as an actor and filmmaker.
If I were to nitpick, and I will (!), I would have liked to have known more about how the act of filmmaking itself impacted Matias’ artistic choices and his emotional well-being. While it doesn’t go as deep as Almodóvar’s masterwork, Before We Forget remains a striking debut for the filmmakers. What it lacks in a certain sexiness (calling this movie chaste would be an understatement), it more than makes up for that with something new to say about the way the human mind works to distort or misinterpret the past in order to feel at peace.
By Glenn Gaylord, Senior Film Critic
Before We Forget opens in New York on July 11th and in Los Angeles July 18th, with additional markets starting July 25th.
For more film reviews by Glenn Gaylord subscribe to his new YouTube channel here ——> GLENN HATES EVERYTHING
Leave a Reply